Tuesday's Bargain or Bust?

For at least a week now my Mom has been talking up a shopping spot she just had to hit up this Tuesday. She was beyond excited that Pawn America sells DVD's two for $5.00 on Tuesdays. She had been seeing the commercials for weeks and could think of endless gifts she could create out of this amazing deal. She found a local friend (I think for safety) and made the big trip. This is our conversation today following her return from Pawn America...

Mom: "Well that was kind of a bust"

Me: "You didn't find any DVD's?"

Mom: "Not really", sounding pretty bummed out about it.

Me: "Sorry to hear that I know you were pretty excited about this trip"

Mom: "Ya, well I did get two DVD's, did you ever see the one with Tom Hanks stuck in the airport?"

Me: "Yes"

When I answered yes she became even more upset even making me relay to her what the plot was to prove I had actually seen it.

Mom: With her last dose of disgust and disappointment she finally shares what was the worst part about shopping for the DVD's as she explained "I was mad because the DVD's were used"

Me: "Well you were at a PAWN shop"

Also known as Jasmine

To no surprise to any of you I love the show "The Sing-Off". As I was watching tonight my Mom called and the following conversation occurred...

Mom: "Are you watching that show you like?"

Me: "Of course"

Mom: "Do you think that lady judge is pretty?"

Me: "Yes, very pretty"

Mom: "Me too, she looks just like that girl from...oh what's her name...you know...Mrs. Aladdin".

Me: "Glad to hear they did end up getting married"

Mom: Hangs up, has to hear what the judges think.

Spring Break

We have had the good fortune to book a family spring break this year. You can only imagine that though this trip is several months away I have already been cautioned of the many dangers we may incur at our family friendly time share in Florida. My favorite caution thus far...

Mom: "I don't really like the idea of you going there for spring break."

Me: Thinking my Mom is confused as to where we are going I ask,"Going where?"

Mom: "Florida, that is where all the drunks will be"

Me: "Well I am not too worried that we are going to be getting too caught up with all the spring break partying when we are bringing a two year old along. We will be hitting the beach at 9am and fast asleep by 9pm."

Mom: "That is my point exactly!"

Me: "Huh?"

Mom: "You will be taking Laney to the beach and all the drunks will be falling all over her! That is where they sleep you know!"

They are right, you learn something new every day.

Internet Wizzard

My Mom Buck graciously babysat for me today so I could work at a bazaar selling hair bows. My Mom Buck was given a cell phone for her birthday this past April, due to many unexplainable events this cell phone is never in working order. We do not have a land line so prior to my departure I logged into her gmail account so she could email me with any questions or concerns while I was away. This system actually worked pretty well and I was able to identify where the coloring books were via email. Upon my return home I went to log her out of her gmail account, she quickly pointed out several I should not open because they were viruses. I also noted she had over 3,000 emails.


Me: "Do you know you have over 3,000 emails in your account?"

Mom: "Oh I thought you never had to do anything with the ones you have read"

Me: "Why don't you delete the ones you don't want or need any longer?"

Mom: "Oh I don't know how to eject emails"

Guess she is not the "internet wizard" my Grandma commonly refers to her as.

Vegas Cautions

My apologies for the lack of posts, but as my Mom Buck has stated several times it is going to be really hard for me to get any material as she is really "melancholy in the fall". This statement has proven NOT to be true, but out of respect for my Mom Buck I have not posted many of the recent events that would have made great posts out of specific requests from the star of the show.

That being said I will carry on with some cautions my Mom Buck offered prior to a recent trip to Vegas...

Mom: "Laura, you keep a very close eye on your drinks, you don't want anyone putting rubbies in it"

Me: "I think you mean ruffies"

Mom: "Whatever it is called I am not kidding, you don't leave Eric's side"

Me: "Okay" with a hint of normal sarcasm.

Mom: "Now you stay right next to Eric the entire time you are there"

Me: "Okay" with much sarcasm.

Mom: Sterner this time, "I meant it Laura, with you two cute girls wandering around some pimp could steel you and put you right into prostitution!"

Me: "Right"

Mom: Lighthearted now, "Love you and have fun!"

Therapy

My Mom Buck has been helping out by babysitting while I have gone to some recent physical therapy appointments. Upon returning home from my last appointment she asked what I did while I was there. The remainder of the conversation went like this...

Mom: "What do you do there?"

Me: "The PT has me do some different exercises to check my progress and my strength"

Already distracted or disinterested My Mom Buck didn't give much of a reply.

Me again: "Yes it is actually kind of awkward"

Mom: "Why would it be awkward?"

I proceeded to show her a strength test where I had one leg on the PT dudes shoulder, knees bent, and had to do some side like push up.

My Mothers natural response was, "Well, do you have pants on?"

Me: "WHAT, why would I NOT have pants on Mom?!"

Mom: Very calmly, "Well you don't wear pants at some doctors"

...and at that she again put my therapy out of her mind. Conversation over.

Carnival Rides

The following phone conversation and email exchange happened today...

Me: "Hello"

Mom: Again breathlessly,"I am so embarrassed!"

Me: 'Uh oh"

Mom: "I have a virus, cousin Erik, Matt said I did it, oh no"

Me: "Slow down, what?"

Mom: "Cousin Erik sent me something and if I clicked on it I would get to see cool carnival rides, Matt (son) said this is what probably caused the virus"

Me: "Yep, but I bet those carnival rides sounded really cool though."

Mom: "Well I really wanted to see them and now I am so embarrassed, I think we have an anti- virus on our computer, but I don't know how to work it, I could just die!"

Mom: Hangs up.

Within the next half our...

Email message on my phone from my dear friend Abby, the title read Question?
Just checked my hotmail and noted that your Mom posted on my wall... "Major Airlines are Threatening Me." Think she has a virus in her computer or a hacker on her facebook account? OR do you think she's really feeling threatened?

I promptly replied letting her know Buck was okay.

My Mom Bucks apologies to all who now have weird posts on their wall, she just wanted to see cool carnival rides.

Horses and Terrorists

My husband decided to alert my Mom on Saturday that there was a horse show on. Yes, I said a horse show. Pretty horses with little riders prancing around to songs like You can Dance if You Want To by Men at Work.

My Mom answered in a panicked voice and without even a "hello" *breathlessly bellowed, "Are you calling about terrorists?!"

My husband calmly replied, "No I am not calling about terrorists I am calling about the horses on TV". A state of serenity washes over my Mother as she immediatley hangs up to find the remote.

*My Mom always sounds breathless when she answers the phone. I often ask if she just completed a set of hurdles in order to reach the phone. She laughs every time and states she doesn't know what I am talking about.

God Bless Her...

For years friends have been aware of my "reading blogs" addiction and several of you have asked me to start a blog. I have always denied stating I don't know what I would write about. Well this may not be the blog many of you expected, it is a blog nonetheless. This blog is about my Mother and for those of you who know her realize quickly that I will never have a lack of material, which has always been my blog writer hesitation. This blog will be dedicated to the words of wisdom, motherly advice, stories, and warnings about "My Mom Buck".

Let's get started. My Mom is enjoying her first fall as a retired pre-school teacher. Well God bless her, she has been contemplating heavily on what she can do to fill her time in terms of volunteerism. She had indicated an interest in singing in the church group that volunteers their voices to sing at funerals. My Mom calls the church and speaks to the receptionist about setting up a time to hear this choir sing and learn more about it. Our conversation following this call goes like this...

Mom-"Well I talked to the lady at St. Stephen's. I couldn't really tell if I liked her or not. She was a jaw talker, ya know?"
Me- "Okay"
Mom-"I did tell her for the second largest church in the archdiocese I am very disappointed in their music program. She did agree with me there so maybe I do like her"
We close this discussion with my Mom heading off to their regularly scheduled practice the next day.

Conversation following meeting the next day...
Me- "Well how was your meeting?"
Mom-Somewhat distracted and laughing replies, "Well, hmmm", avoiding a direct answer.
Me-"You called the wrong church" No question mark needed.
Mom-"Well I got to church and no one knew what I was talking about and I couldn't find the lady on I spoke to on the phone. Hold on I am on the computer, I am looking at what number I called...okay here it is 453 Main Street, NC...is NC North Carolina?"
Me- "Yes, that would be what NC stands for"
Mom- "Phone number 617...
Me-"Mom you dialed a 617 area code to a church a mile away and that didn't trigger you may have the wrong church?"
Mom-"Laura I don't know all the area codes in MN"
Me-"The church is down the street, have you ever dialed 617 in your life?!"
Mom-Laughing "I don't know, I must have been distracted when I was dialing"

The conversation on that topic ends there. She plans on going back to St. Stephen's in Anoka, MN the following day to hear their funeral choir sing. Things like this happen daily to my Mother, I will be mostly sharing the advice as I feel it is too important not to share with the rest of you...as my Mother's favorite quote would be "better safe than sorry". I hope that this blog can add some humor to your day and who knows maybe you will even learn something.